Home To Say Goodbye
I know I haven't posted in a while, there's just been to much sadness in my life to post something happy. Every day I think about my good friend and I miss him. I still don't think it's set in that he's really gone. I went home last week to say goodbye to him. The service was beautiful, all of the soldiers in uniform, and a packed church an hour before things got started, it was very touching.
It was very difficult to go to Camden's house, see his sister, and know that Camden would never physically be there again. All of his high school friends got together the night of his visitation. It was nice to see everyone, we sort of held each other up while we were all together. Everyone was struggling, and we were just there for each other, that's all we knew to do.
The eulogy was read in three parts, with me reading the first part. It was the hardest thing I've ever done. But I was honored to get the chance to tell stories from my childhood with Camden. I told things to make people laugh, and draw a clear pictures of the mischievous boy that grew into an honorable man. I kept it together by thinking the entire time, if Camden were doing this for me, he would hold it together for my families sake, so I did, I read what I wrote loud and strong, and I kept my tears in until later.
When we left the church and drove out to the cemetery, the streets were lined with people holding flags. It was the most powerful thing I've ever seen. Small children, senior citizens, JROTC members from the high school, cotton gin workers, teachers, farmers, I saw so many faces I recognized. As we made that two mile drive there must have been at least 1000 people standing out in the freezing weather. I saw homemade signs reading, "You're our hero Camden," and I saw people that I'd never seen before with tears running down their faces. At the cemetery, he was given a full military burial. My tears I'd fought so hard to keep in spilled out when they played Taps. I just couldn't hold it in any longer.
I didn't want to leave Camden that day, and I didn't want to drive all the way back to Little Rock. But I thought if it were him, he'd leave me, and go back to his responsibilities. But I know he'd come visit me every chance he got.
posted by Anne @ 12:24 PM
1 Comments:
I just wanted to tell you....you made your dad and I so proud for the way you honored Camden. What you said....was absolutely perfect and there wouldn't have been a thing I would have changed. As I listened to your eulogy, I could see clearly the kids you were and the young adults you became. Your dad and I have had more than a dozen people to say they appreciated so much you sharing your life with Camden with all of them. Some folks that were there out of respect of Camden's parents said they had not had the opportunity to meet Camden but felt as though they knew him because of your words of him.
It will be a long time before our hurt dims and I know there are times when you can't catch your breath for the pain of losing him. It is that way for us as well. How so glad we are to have had him in our life. Your brother says he is a better person for having had Camden in his life and I know we all agree....that is the way it is for us as well.
Take care of you.
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